A man in a clown costume stands on outdoor steps, leaning back with arms raised, between two tall buildings. Text reads: Joaquin Phoenix, Joker, October 4.Have you seen the new Joker movie yet?

As far as I’m aware after watching it, The Joker does not have a library card. This is just one of the many profoundly sad things that you can expect from Joker. I am hopeful, however, that in the next movie there will be at least somewhere between three and 56 scenes dedicated to him visiting his local library.

If they do decide to feature a library in the next Joker movie, here’s what I envision he would check out with his library card.

 

Yellow book cover titled "Comedy Writing Secrets" with a cartoon figure slipping on a banana peel. Text mentions it's a best-selling guide to writing and performing comedy by Mel Helitzer.

Comedy Writing Secrets by Melvin Helitzer

The Joker is not particularly funny, and his stand up career is laughable at best. There’s no shame in going back to basics and brushing up on your comedy writing skills.

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Comic book cover featuring Batman in front of a large yellow bat signal, with the title "Batman Vol. 1: I Am Gotham" at the bottom.

Batman by Tom King

The best way to defeat your enemy is to learn as much about him as possible, right?

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Cover of the book “How to Win Friends & Influence People” by Dale Carnegie, 80th Anniversary Edition, with white text on a red background.

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

The Joker could really use some people on his side. The laugh isn’t helping, but there is hope.

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Cover of the book "Bobbi Brown Makeup Manual," featuring a makeup brush with pink powder and a smear of pink makeup above the title text.

Bobbi Brown Makeup Manual: For Everyone from Beginner to Pro by Bobbi Brown

His makeup technique is so-so at best. I feel like if he learned about setting spray and practiced a few techniques then he could really take his look to the next level.

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A child in a yellow raincoat faces a red balloon held by a sinister figure in shadow; text reads "You'll float too. IT" with a release date of September 8.

IT (2018)

Everybody has to have somebody to look up to.

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Poster for "Walk the Line" showing a silhouette of a man holding a guitar, with flames in the background and the words "Walk the Line" and "November" in bold letters.

Walk the Line (2005)

For some reason the actor in this one just looks really really familiar. A long lost brother, perhaps?

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